I apologize in advance for what you are about to read. Let’s just say I got a little bored with the usual format. You can just scroll down to the bottom line if thats what you want. This is a typical meal with my girls (two daughters, one wife).
Family member: “Where are we going for Father’s Day”
Dad: “Sicily Osteria”
Family member: “Ooooh, where’s that”
Dad: “Hmm, Hell’s Kitchen”
Family member: “Yas!!!!!”
Family member: “Sweet!!”
(Family approaches restaurant)
Family member: “What in the actual fuck”
Dad: “Its actually “what the actual fuck”, without the in”
Family member: “Who are you and what did you do with my dad”
Dad: “I will explain”
Family member: “I thought you said Hell’s Kitchen”
Dad: “It’s technically Hell’s Kitchen. Remember I used to give food tours here”
Family member: “Who are all these strange looking people”
Dad: “They are tourists”
(Family settles in a nice table outside)
Family member: “Explain!”
Dad: “Well, this place opened about a year ago. The menu is as Sicilian as it gets, the chef worked at Osteria Morini, and Marea. The owners are from…”
Family member: “Oooh Limoncello Spritz, I’ll have that”
Family member: “Please dont tell me you are ordering the sardine ragu special”
Dad: “I think the waiter meant Pasta Con le Sarde.”
Family member: “I dont know what that means”
Dad: “You had it in Palermo and you liked it. Its the one with the raisins”
(food starts to arrive)
Family member: “Yummmm!!! Love the pita chips”
Dad: “Its actually Pannelle, made from chickpeas”
Family member: “Wow, best Arancini ever”
Dad: “Its Arancino, since its one. And yeah this is yummy”
Family Member: “Whats up with the schweddy balls”
Dad: Thats Crocche, fried potato balls”
Family member: “Why is everyone so old looking”
Dad: “Tourists tend to be older. This is not East Village”
Family member: “Nor Hell’s Kitchen evidently”
Dad: “It’s called Restaurant Row, technically Hell’s Kitchen”
Family member: “So what is the deal with this place anyway”
Dad: “Well, owners are actually from Sicily. They also own bocca di bacco, and…
Family member: “So, what is everyone watching?”
Family member: “Black Mirror is out!”
Family member: “OMG I love that show!”
(more food arrives)
Family member: “Any guesses what Italian region the waiter is from”
Dad: “I think he is from the region of Venezuela”
Family member: “What about the chef. What region is he from?”
Dad: “Actually he grew up in a Kibbutz in Israel. His name is Asi Maman and he’s very talented.”
Family member: “So no one here is actually Italian, and this is supposedly Hell’s Kitchen. Ok, got it”
Family member: “Well this pasta is yummy, but weird looking”
Dad: “Its Busiate alla Trapanese, and I agree its delicious”
Family member: “Let me guess, another Palermo specialty?”
Dad: “No, Trapani. Its in the name, and we ate this there”
Family member: “Sorry again for throwing out your #1 dad mug”
Dad: “What will remind me now”
Family member: “You are ruining the surprise”
Family member: This Couscous needs more Couscous”
Dad: “Its done on purpose like that so it wont absorb all the broth. It makes for tastier seafood”
Family member: “This is sick! How did you find this place”
Dad: “Yellow Pages”
Family member: “You know, your dad jokes dont work well with us”
Dad: “I found it on Eater when it first opened, looked at the menu, and..”
Family member: “I dont know what to wear tomorrow”
Family member: “They say rain in the AM’
(pistachio lava cake arrives)
Family member: “OMG, OMG”
Family member: “Slay!”
Dad: “I think I just peed a little”
Family member: “You really need to see someone about that”
Family member: “I dont know why we continue to doubt you”
Family member: “Good pick dad!”
The Bottom Line: Surprisingly strong meal among the tourists. Restaurant Row changed a little during the last few years due to the pandemic as some places had to close and new owners dont want to keep relying on tourists. While I think the change is temporary, places like Sicily Osteria, and EAK Ramen are probably here to stay (I hope). Sicily Osteria instantly becomes one of the most interesting Italian in HK, and perhaps the most authentic Sicilian menu in NYC. The pastas lean on the sweet side as its done in the south, but enjoyable nonetheless.
Sicily Osteria
330 W 46th St (Hell’s Kitchen)
Recommended Dishes: Pannelle, Arancino, Crocche, Busiate, Couscous, Pistachio Lava Cake
The Gotham West Market’s executive in charge of luring interesting new vendors must have one of the toughest jobs in America. It turns out that surviving so deep inside Hell’s Kitchen, a neighborhood dominated by young professionals and Bulldogs is pretty tough. Ivan Ramen Slurp Shop is the only original vendor left since they opened about 5 years ago. Changes are happening in a furious pace. Latest shocker is the departure of Genuine Roadside, a burger joint owned by Avroko the firm that designed GWM. Sources tell me Corner Bistro another burger joint will be its replacement. Yes, I have sources.
Eating With Ziggy 